I’ve been wanting to talk about emotional satisfaction for the longest time because I feel it’s one aspect of building a relationship and long lasting bond with your spouse that is greatly neglected especially now that it seems like everyone is on a fast lane!
Can we pause a little and talk about this?
Emotional satisfaction refers to the feeling of contentment, happiness, and fulfillment that comes from achieving one’s emotional needs and desires. It involves experiencing positive emotions, such as joy, love, and pride, and feeling satisfied with one’s relationships, activities, and overall life circumstances.
Talking about feeling satisfied in one’s relationship, do you know that being emotionally satisfied as an adult and being able to emotionally satisfy your partner has a lot to do with how we were raised as children?
Let me break this down…
Good parenting leaves on a child a secure imprint of intimacy that forms positive beliefs and healthy expectations about all future relationships. Memories of comfort are a strong indicator you were imprinted by your early experiences to express feelings, seek connection, and expect relief when life gets bumpy and you hit the potholes of life.
Have you ever had issues with your best friend when you were younger or had a bully in school or failed an exam and came home with a bad result?
How did your parents handle this? Were you able to talk about it with them? How did they react? Were they able to comfort you? Did you feel emotionally secure when they comforted you? Were you scolded and then comforted or were you outrightly neglected and made to feel like your feelings weren’t valid?
How do you react now as an adult when you’re going through life hurdles? Do you feel like no one understands you and recoil? or do you feel like the need to be comforted or the desire to talk about it with someone dear to you?
Answer these questions honestly and you will realize where your need for comfort and emotional satisfaction or your inability to satisfy your partner emotionally stems from.
Talking about your inner emotions and experiences as a child helps your parents know you but most importantly it helps you know yourself.
The self-awareness that comes from learning to reflect gives us the ability to understand our reactions, behaviors, needs and inner conflicts when we are adults especially with our significant other. This ability is one of the most important skills to bring to a marriage!
When emotional connection is lacking especially as a child, you learn to restrict emotions and minimize what’s bothering you and you will not expect relationships to offer comfort thereby being unable to satisfy your partner’s emotions.
After all it’s hard to expect or give something you’ve never experienced… And when you are with someone who was emotionally connected to their primary caregiver (parents), there will always be friction because they expect this same connection from you…
We need to realize that we all weren’t raise the same way. The person who wasn’t raised to depend emotionally on their primary caregiver might not understand what it means to be able to satisfy their partner emotionally and it’s not their fault. It takes a conscious effort on their part as a grown adult to be able to give emotional satisfaction and for the other party it takes an understanding of this dynamic to appreciate and be patient with your partner.
Comfort is not possible unless an emotional connection is made. Sometimes your partner doesn’t need you to tell them what to do, they only need you to validate their feelings.
Funny how our childhood practically defines our adulthood in every way right?
When you’re upset, you won’t think twice about seeking relief through relationships because that is the way you were raised, that was your imprint growing up. It is natural for you to go to your mate for comfort.
Emotional satisfaction is a non-negotiable when it comes to intimate relationships. We are all emotional beings even though not alike. It should not be trivialized and never make your partner feel like they are asking for too much or stressing you when they come seeking comfort ❤️
Up next : Emotional Satisfaction : What i have discovered.
What are your thoughts on Emotional Satisfaction? Do you think you’re emotionally satisfied in your current relationship or do you feel there should be more? Let’s talk about it, you can drop a comment or send a direct message to my mail.
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